June 20, 2006--Dying Old
For someone in my circumstances—getting on in years yet blessed with a much younger wife—the news reported in the NY Times is encouraging that the gap in life expectancies between men and women is narrowing (article linked below). In fact it is narrowest right now since 1946, when I suppose men stopped being killed in the Second World War!
But, the Times reports alas, if current trends continue, the gap won’t close until about 2056, fifty years from now. Little good that will do me! But what about those of you who will be around at that time? How is life likely to be different?
First of all, if old folks worry a lot about money, women who as a result will be much less likely to be widowed, will have more of it—men will be around to collect social security (if the system isn’t bankrupt) and men still have more income from pensions then women.
Also, since men now begin to fail much earlier than women and thus require the care that their wives provide, men in the future who will be living longer will be more available than at present to provide assistance to their wives.
But for this to be true much more needs to change than just the death gap. We do not as yet know the long-term effects of recent decades’ move toward gender equity; but studies show that though income gaps may have narrowed, the care gap remains pretty much the same, with women disproportionately doing most of the care giving.
As one woman in her 70s recently shot back, when her husband asked if they were ready to move into assisted-living, “He’s had assisted-living for the past 40 years!”
I haven’t done any formal studies of this issue, but from the experience of my life, many women of a certain age that I have known would be happy to forgo the little extra there would be in the bank account if their husbands lived longer or the begrudging help they might be willing to provide in an emergency—let’s be honest, how many men even now leap at the opportunity to accompany their wives to medical tests—they would be willing to forego this for a little peace, a little respite from having to wait on their princes hand and foot. They probably wouldn’t admit it in public, but I suspect that more women than one might imagine are not so happy about this demographic trend.
Did I ever tell you about my Aunt Fay and Uncle Harry . . . ?
But, the Times reports alas, if current trends continue, the gap won’t close until about 2056, fifty years from now. Little good that will do me! But what about those of you who will be around at that time? How is life likely to be different?
First of all, if old folks worry a lot about money, women who as a result will be much less likely to be widowed, will have more of it—men will be around to collect social security (if the system isn’t bankrupt) and men still have more income from pensions then women.
Also, since men now begin to fail much earlier than women and thus require the care that their wives provide, men in the future who will be living longer will be more available than at present to provide assistance to their wives.
But for this to be true much more needs to change than just the death gap. We do not as yet know the long-term effects of recent decades’ move toward gender equity; but studies show that though income gaps may have narrowed, the care gap remains pretty much the same, with women disproportionately doing most of the care giving.
As one woman in her 70s recently shot back, when her husband asked if they were ready to move into assisted-living, “He’s had assisted-living for the past 40 years!”
I haven’t done any formal studies of this issue, but from the experience of my life, many women of a certain age that I have known would be happy to forgo the little extra there would be in the bank account if their husbands lived longer or the begrudging help they might be willing to provide in an emergency—let’s be honest, how many men even now leap at the opportunity to accompany their wives to medical tests—they would be willing to forego this for a little peace, a little respite from having to wait on their princes hand and foot. They probably wouldn’t admit it in public, but I suspect that more women than one might imagine are not so happy about this demographic trend.
Did I ever tell you about my Aunt Fay and Uncle Harry . . . ?
posted by Steven Zwerling at
3:17 PM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]
<< Home