Friday, March 13, 2009

March 13, 2009--Sardines

My father had a joke for almost every occasion. His sardines joke is about as good a statement as any I’ve heard regarding the circumstances in which we currently find ourselves. It goes like this:

Lewis Brown (actually, as my father told it, it was “Mr. Schwartz,” but all things considered I here prefer “Brown”), Mr. Brown calls his friend Sam Rogers and says, “Sam, do I have a deal for you. I have a warehouse filled with thousands of cans of sardines. Since you’re my friend, I’ll let you have them for only $10,000.”

Rogers agrees to buy them and two weeks later calls his friend William Green. He says, “Bill, do I have a deal for you. I have a warehouse filled with sardines, which, since you are my friend, I’ll let you have for just $15,000.”

Green buys them and soon after that calls his friend Harvey Scott. He says to Harvey, “Since you're my best friend, I have a wonderful deal for you. I have 500 shipping containers filled with tins of sardines which I can let you have for only $25,000.”

Scott sends him a check and a month later goes to the warehouse to see his sardines. While there, he decides to taste them. He opens a tin and discovers that the sardines have spoiled. So he tries another can. Same result. He thinks maybe these are an exception and so he tries sardines from three other containers. All are spoiled.

Upset, he calls his friend Bill Green who in turn calls his friend Sam Rogers who then calls Lewis Brown. “Lew,” he says, “I just learned that all the sardines you sold me are rotten. What’s going on?”

Sam says to him, “What did you expect. These are not eating sardines; they are buying and selling sardines.”

Get it? Just like much of the current economy. These are not real mortgages; they are buying and selling mortgages.

And, down here in South Florida, these are not condos to live in, but rather buying and selling condos.

Take Icon Brickell, for example, which is not a religious shrine but rather a $1.25 billion 1,646-condo real estate colossus on Brickell Avenue in downtown Miami. It was built by the tycoon Jorge Perez as his real estate piece de resistance, but is languishing virtually unoccupied in spite of its 28,000 square foot fitness center and two-acre pool deck with its 12-foot-high limestone fireplaces. In spite of its majestic entrance, which is adorned with one hundred 22-foot-tall columns sculpted, at the cost of $15 million, to resemble the monumental moai statues on Easter Island.

The Icon is basically uninhabited because it was not meant to be inhabited. Like my father’s sardines these condos were built to be flipped. According to the New York Times (article linked below) only 30 of the 500 units that were ready for closing in December have closed.

And so, to quote Jack McCabe of McCabe Research and Consulting, “It could very much be that his masterpiece will also be his downfall.” Which could serve as the coda for this era.


Postcript

I am not a fan of the Daily Show or Jon Stewart, but have been applauding his criticism of CNBC, NBC’s so-called financial news network, especially Stewart’s attempts to hold Jim Cramer of Mad Money accountable for his errant stock predictions and shenanigans. How he and his CNBC colleagues have been complicitous in puffing up the financial bubble which exploded recently, wiping out the life savings of so many who did the right and conservative thing with their finances.

If you didn’t see the Daily Show last night, where Cramer was Stewart’s guest, it is required viewing if you want a glimpse behind the veil of how these financial “journalists” are effectively in bed with the leaders of the industry they purport to cover.

You can see the interview via the link below. Be sure to watch all three parts.

http://www.dailykostv.com/w/000988/

1 Comments:

Blogger wonderlearner said...

I have always fancied taking sardines, bread and a bottle of milk for breakfast every morning. I guess anyone would say i am addicted to sardines. Reading this article, i had a new perspective. Thanks, Amigo!
I would be Glad if you read https://www.tecteem.com/zedge/

February 20, 2020  

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