November 22, 2013--Still Numb

Everyone old enough is thinking back to 50 years ago.

"Where were you when you heard?"

No one needs to ask, "Heard what?"

I was typing notes for a class I would be teaching later in the day at Queens College. That and everything else except the grief was suspended. It was not necessary to call the college to see if classes were being cancelled. I just knew. We just knew all we needed to know. The assassination. That was it.

There was fear. We were still waging the Cold War and, who knew, maybe the Russians were responsible and there would be more. It was only a year and a month since the Cuban Missile Crisis when we stood at the brink of a full-scale nuclear war. That was not propaganda or political posturing. It was one minute to midnight.

If you had someone to cling to, to weep with, you did.

And watch on black-and-white TV through that longest day and into and through the night and next day. And the day after that. And then one more day.

Numb.

Still numb today.

It will never be different. Or the same.