April 30, 2018--Alter Boy

Devoted to the simplistic macho writing of novelist Ayn Rand, House Speaker Paul Ryan, when it comes time to be a tough guy in real life--as they used to say in my old Brooklyn neighborhood--folds like a cheap camera.

But he had me going there for awhile the other day when I picked up some breaking news that he had fired the House chaplain, Father Patrick Conroy. 

These priests can't keep their hands off those teenage House pages, I thought, like so many in the Congress have been prone to in years past. Remember in 2006 Florida Representative Mark Foley of the wandering hands? 

The Speaker, I thought, liberated by his decision to step aside later this year, in high dudgeon, finally wielded his power. Maybe, I also thought, perhaps he will find a way to croak out a few words of criticism about his president. 

I know, don't hold my breath.

But then, true to his form, when the full story came out, it appears that the Speaker reverted to his craven self.

He sacked the good Father because in one of his morning sermons (which no one usually listens or pays attention to), rather than bringing Jesus into the House, he alluded to the unfairness of the tax cuts Congress was debating with Paul Ryan, about the only subject that makes his heart beat fast or evokes his piety--cutting taxes for the rich--egging his members on. Not that they need much egging.

Last November, when the House was considering the tax bill, in his morning prayer, Rev. Conroy said--

May all members be mindful that the institutions and structures of our great nation guarantee the opportunities that have allowed some to achieve great success, while others continue to struggle. May their efforts these days guarantee that there are no winners and losers under new tax laws, but benefits balanced and shared by all Americans.

With these compassionate words, he was cooked. 

About a week later the father was admonished by the Speaker's office. He claimed, "A staffer came down and said, 'We are upset with this prayer; you are getting too political'."

Because of Ryan's action, a religious war broke out on the floor of the House. Not a burning issue for me, but this flap exposed another fissure in Congress between traditional, mainly Northern Catholics and Southern evangelical Republicans, who want very different kinds of chaplains to lead their daily prayers. 

The Dems are sitting back enjoying the scrum, happy to add this to their list of Republican unforced political errors, hoping it will help them win enough seats in November to take control of at least the House of Representatives.

And while they're at it maybe they'll take a look at the extra-constitutional practice of both houses of Congress having chaplains on the payroll. James Madison, for one, resisted the idea that Congress should employ them if the framers wanted there to be a clear separation between church and state.

Again, don't hold your breath because in the meantime, carved in the marble lintel above the Speaker's chair in the House is, "In God We Trust."

But not to worry, there will soon be lots for Congress to do. Like impeaching the president.