November 25, 2005--Fanaticisms X--"Filth" In the Church

The NY Times reports that the Vatican is about to release its long-awaited report about the ordination of gay priests (see full article below). Actually, about the non-ordination of homosexuals. That is, about the non-ordination of men “who are actively homosexual, have deep-seated homosexual tendencies, or support the so-called ‘gay culture.’” Really that is, how men who have had only “transitory” homosexual tendencies, which they have “clearly overcome,” will be eligible for ordination. Actually that is, how these men who have overcome these tendencies can become priests if they overcame them at least three years before ordination. Truly actually that is, if anyone can actually define “overcome”—it comes down to what your definition of “is” is. Sorry—what your definition of “overcome” is.

Now that this is perfectly clear, the Church can get back to its basic business—ministering to its flock, saving souls, and paying off all those children who priests have been convicted of molesting.

After all, that’s what these new directives are about—the trouble the Church got into when the molestations and cover-ups became widely known. The belief that this situation was caused by gay priests gone wild.

There are a few problems here. To begin, not only do we have to figure out how to define “transitory” and “overcame”; but also, since there are no known blood or DNA tests yet available that can determine who has or does not have gay “tendencies," bishops, seminary directors, and “spiritual advisors” will have to come up with their own methods (confession??) to detect those tendencies or determine what has or hasn’t been overcome and how long ago that overcoming happened. We’re not talking “Don’t ask, don’t tell.” Perhaps, more, “Do tell.”

Then we have the problem with all the clear evidence which states that homosexuality and pedophilia are not the same thing nor are they equatable or causal. So even keeping gay men out of the priesthood will not guarantee that priests will keep their hands off little Jimmy.

Cardinal Zenon Grocholewski, who served as Pope John Paul’s “defender of the faith” for two decades and as Prefect for the Vatican department that oversees Catholic education ordered this new document, spoke out recently about the “filth in the Church” that needs to be dealt with. It’s good to know that as the result of his good work they have finally figured out how to do that cleansing.

On a related subject—for some time I have been wondering about nuns. From the many stories I have heard from friends who went to Catholic school, it is clear that we may have a problem here as well. In the spirit of gender equity, what is Cardinal Grocholewski thinking about this "filth" and what is he going to do about it? Now that we have the priest situation taken care of I think we also have to get to work on this.