September 12, 2006--Moonachie?

Sitting here in Soho at Balthazar, reading the NY Times while sucking down the last of my $7.00 double espresso and my $2.50 tartine, I came upon an article about a report from the Harvard Institute for Global Health which finds that of all the cities and towns and counties in the northeast, residents of Bergen County, New Jersey have the longest life expectancy—79.9 years. (Story linked below.)

The lowest, 74.7 years, is Essex County which is not surprising because the largest city in Essex is Newark, which also has the highest murder rate—both statistics are of course related.

Just as I was about to call the real estate agent at Corcoran to put my 9th Street coop on the market while simultaneously asking what might be for sale in Hackensack, Englewood, Teterboro, or Moonachie, I caught myself, thinking, “But where in Bergen County would I get my morning tartine?”

So I did some Googling and here’s what I found—

In Teterboro there is a very fine airport for private planes (the runways though are a little short and at times the jets run off them and onto nearby highways) but no good place for espresso. Moonachie, though decidedly in New Jersey, is home to Giants Stadium and the Continental Arena where the New York Giants play as do the New York Jets and the New York Nets. So since folks from New York will come frequently to watch their teams play, I’ll be a little less homesick in Moonachie.

And there are other things that make Moonachie attractive—since 2001 there have been no homicides, and historically the town has a very low rate of tornadic activity. And at Berta’s Chateau they appear to serve pretty good cappuccino.

But above all, there are 41 cemeteries in Moonachie, including the B’Nai Israel, so I’ll be set after living out my 79.9 years.