May 17, 2012--Facebook Junk

Of course I can't prove it's not a coincidence, but during the weeks leading up to Facebook's Initial Public Offering (IPO), I have been bombarded by a wave of on-line, unsolicited advertisements.

My e-mail Junk Box has been fuller than ever. Whereas previously I would receive about a dozen a day, I have been inundated daily by at least three-times that number.

The reason I am suggesting Facebook may be responsible for this intrusion is because, during the run-up to the IPO, investors and Wall Street wonks have been raising questions about Facebook's ability to make money from all the information they have about their nearly 1.0 billion users.

The only way to cash in from the data they have gathered about us is through targeted ads on our Facebook pages, selling our personal information to others, or by eventually branching out--perhaps like Amazon--to sell us stuff. Recall, Amazon started out selling just books. Now you can buy almost everything there, including, they announced last week, designer clothing.

I of course liked it better when Amazon was in the book business, but admittedly at that time they were losing money.

You be the judge. Here's a sample of the junk e-mails I received this morning:

SeniorPeople.com. They promise to show me "Photos of 50-plus Senior People Near Me!" 

Mate1, where I can "View Photos of Beautiful People In My City!" 

The LASIK Vision Institute where they offer "LASIK Vision Specials Starting at $299 Per Eye!" Act Now! they urge. 

HotTub.com that promises I can "Pick Up a Healthy Habit that Feels Good!" 

AIG Direct Inc. The U.S. government-bailed-out insurer offers "$750,000 of Term Life Coverage for Less Than $32/Month!" 

The next one, considering Mate1 and SeniorPeople.com, comes as no surprise--Match.com promises that I can "Search Singles Online Free!" 

And then there is something called the Pimsieur Approach SPANISH that will help me "Break the Language Barrier in Only 10 Days!"

What's to be gleaned from this?

Clearly that I am old (the LASIK and SeniorPeople pitches) and that, this time wrong, they assume I am single.

On the other hand, since I've been married for nearly 30 years maybe they sense I'm ready to . . . .

What is it that Facebook's artificial intelligence software knows about me that has not as yet registered in my consciousness? I hate to think.

In the meantime I'll look up the HotTub folks. My achy bones could use some hot-tubbing.

And I should also stop worrying about Zuck the wunderkind. He'll be worth a few billion by 4:00 Friday afternoon. Maybe then he'll check out JDate. He'll be quite a catch.