October 20, 2015--Globalization

I'm a creature of deep habit so when I need new underwear I order them on line from Jockey.

I like them because they shun printed labels and come in long sizes. Unless I have long undershirts, they ride up and out pops my plumber's crack.

Part of my obsessiveness has me doing this twice a year--early fall and early spring. Each time 12 pairs of briefs and 12 v-neck tees.

My recent order just arrived and I was pleased to see stitched-on labels in the shorts but, alas, printed ones in the tees. I should have ordered a few more dozen and stashed them away because the trend in labels is clear.

I did notice on them that all the underwear was made in Cambodia.

Cambodia? Not China? Not the Philippines? Not Sri Lanka? Cambodia? Isn't Cambodia Pol Pot's country? The evil butcher of uncounted millions of his own countrymen? The head of the Khmer Rouge? The communist monster?  Now they're making Jockey shorts?

I know he was overthrown in about 1995 and I suppose it's good news that Cambodians are making underwear for Americans, though I suspect workers are probably fortunate if they are making more than $5.00 a day.

Also, for years I have been using Bic razors for shaving. Metal ones. In fact, my favorites are called just that--"Metal." They haven't been for sale in drug stores for at least a decade so I've bought them mainly on line through eBay. They come in packs of five and so, when I can, I order as many as possible. The last time, a few years ago, I bought a dozen packages and have been using them very carefully, knowing the time will soon come when they will no longer be available from anyone, anywhere.

But I keep searching the Web.

About a month ago a treasure trove of Bic Metals was offered for sale--20 packages of five! One-hundred individual razors. All for about $48 dollars, including shipping.

By my calculation, since one razor lasts me three months, using four a year, I would have a 25-year supply.

For me, virtually a lifetime's amount because I'm assuming if I'm still alive in 25 years I'll probably have a beard down to my waist and no longer have need for a Bic or any other kind of razor.

I'm assuming that Rona will give me a trim with a scissor when she visits me in the nursing home.

But then there was my mother who lived to three days past her 107th birthday. If I have her genes . . . who knows. But for razors, one way or another, I'll be all set. As to underwear, that's another story.

It took forever for the razors to arrive. After about a month, they were waiting at the post office. Rona went in to retrieve them. Usually when there's a package (mainly books from dozens of different booksellers and of course Amazon), it takes her about five minutes to gather what's waiting for us (mainly me) at the postmistress's window. This time Rona was inside for at least 15 minutes.

She was shaking her head when she finally emerged, clutching to her chest the package of what I assumed were the razors.

"You won't believe what they put me through."

"Put you through?"

"Yes. I had to show them two forms of ID and . . . "

"ID? They known you for years. But still they carded you?"

"Yes. And I had to fill out and sign three forms. Homeland Security forms." She collapsed in the passenger seat.

"Homeland Security? Those are the razors, right?" She nodded. "I can understand not being allowed to take them on a plane but these are just razors for shaving. Bic Metals."

"I know what they are and how you're obsessed with them but . . . "

"But what?"

"They came from the Ukraine."

"From where?"

"Ukraine. I think you say it without the The."

Skeptical, I said, "Can I see the package?"

And sure enough it did come from The Ukraine. I mean Ukraine, where the Ukrainians and Russians are fighting. It had Ukrainian and U.S. customs stamps all over it and was wrapped and double wrapped in brown paper and transparent tape. So totally taped up that I knew it would take me half an hour to unpack it.

"I'll bet it not the razors. It must be something else. Do we know anyone who lives in The . . . ?"

"Not as far as I know," Rona said. "Let's get home and open it to see what's in it."

After unloading the car I asked Rona to unwrap the package since I'm not good with those that are all taped up, especially one that was likely to contain something delicate.

But, it turned out, it contained my razors. As advertised, one-hundred of them.

"You mean you didn't realize the razors were coming from Ukraine?"

"Obviously. All I cared about was getting a big hoard to last me forever. It didn't matter where they were coming from."

"The ladies at the post office are dying to hear what's in the package. They're very professional and discrete and never would ask. I assume they know, if they're interested, that they're mainly books. About this one though . . ."

"What a world," I said. "And of course it's OK to tell them about the razors. Even my underwear if you or they would like."

Rona siad, "If you behave like this I won't be coming to the old age home to cut your beard."

February 2, 2015--Halftime Show

Rona growled, "I just read they used 108 footballs in the Super Bowl. A separate one for each play."

"I wonder if they were all legally inflated."

"I think the NFL cared more how much they could sell them for as balls that used during the game."

"Everyone of them is a so-called 'game ball.'"

"Do you think they collected all the uniforms and sneakers and--"

"Jockstraps," I added. "And are selling all of that junk on eBay?"

"The same article said that balls from last year's Super Bowl XLVIII are selling on the secondary market for about $180 each so the bottom line of all this nonsense is not that huge considering the billions in other forms of revenue the Super Bowl generates."

"It's just a game but has become the single most-viewed event in America, sort of a national holiday."

"The cheapest tickets on StubHub were going for $7,000 each. And others sold for upwards of $40,000."

"Insane."

"I'll tell you what's really insane," Rona said, "More than 115 million viewers tuned in, though for sure it was a great game."

"Even crazier, 117 million watched Katy Perry during the halftime show. That's an even bigger mega-event."

"No surprise. She has more Twitter followers than anyone else in the world. Sixty-four million."

"Unbelievable. Who's second and third?"

"Justin Bieber has 60 million followers and the person in third place you won't believe."

"Taylor Swift?" I guessed.

"She's fourth. Guess again."

"Madonna?"

"Wrong again. She's sixth. In third place, with 54 million Twitter followers, is Barack Obama."

"I don't know if I should be depressed about this--especially the Justine Bieber numbers--or impressed that so many people know who the President of the United States is."

"Maybe," Rona quipped, "they think he's a rapper."

"Speaking of Barack Obama, do you know how many watched his recent State of the Union Address? All the networks, even Fox, carried it."

"About 52 million. I think I know where you're going with this."

"Maybe yes, maybe no."

"If more that twice as many watched Katy Perry than the SOTU, why not next year begin the halftime show with Lady Gaga or Rihanna and--"

"That would assure another 'wardrobe malfunction.'"

Ignoring me, Rona said, "And after the music and costume changes, have Obama deliver the State of the Union and--"

"And three-quarters of the 115 million viewers would take a bathroom break."

"Not if they showed a few Budweiser commercials with the Clydesdale horses and that cute lost puppy."

July 15, 2014--eBay

eBay, which started as a place to sell and collect Pez dispensers and then became a venue to put up for bid almost anything--thus it's tagline the Nation's Flea Market--may soon need to come up with a very different way to represent itself.

At first most of the stuff listed for auction was, well, junk. But buyers were attracted to the Website as much by the "action" provided by participating in an auction as by the stuff. How many people actually needed a stuffed Minnie Mouse doll or a glass citrus-slice Christmas tree ornament or a 1954 Sears Roebuck catalog? Apparently tens of millions.

But now, in addition to these tchotchkes, you can make an offer on a 1966 Lotus Elan sports car. The required opening bid is $20,000. And, as incredible as it my seem, cars like this--though you can't take them out for a test-drive--actually get sold via eBay for very big bucks.

What do I know.

Obviously not much because soon you will be able to bid on paintings by Andy Warhol through a deal eBay recently struck with Sotheby's.

Starting this fall, eBay's 145 million subscribers will be able to bid multimillions online for Picassos as well as Pez dispensers.

(A set of 12 Disneyana Pez dispensers--Mickey, Minnie, Pluto, Donald Duck, Goofy, and the rest of the gang can right now on eBay be yours for $20.22. My guess, you can have them by the end of the week for 20 bucks even.)

A Warhol, on the other hand, could go for $100 million. Shipping, though, is extra. New York to Dubai will cost you.

January 31, 2014--Sneaks

Near where we live in downtown Manhattan, on Lafayette Place, there are a couple of stores that sell athletic shoes.

A few times a year when we are walking south to get to Balthazar or the Smile for morning coffee, we see lined up on the sidewalk at those shops hundreds of young people, kids really--some in tents since they have been living on the street for a couple of days--camped out in all weather, which is frequently nasty, waiting, they tell us, to be among the first to get the newest edition of Air Jordans or some such.

List price, especially if they are in their original wrapper and box--these J's are not for use in schoolyard games, but collectors' items--they are as coveted by these kids as is an Andy Warhol to hedge fund managers that is up for auction at Sotheby's--at the store, the Jordans these days go for up to $150.

And then one can find them offered on eBay the next day for at least twice that. Again, if they are in the original, unblemished box.

Some of the kids on line tell us that they are really placeholders or agents for others. They've been promised a couple hundred bucks to wait out in the rain by someone willing to pay them $500 for a pair. Again, if and only if they are in a pristine box.

Not bad. Five hundred bucks to sit out in the rain or snow for a couple of days.

"Hey, can anybody here find a straight job?"

"Not me, man. I'm livin' again with my Mom."

There are enough models to make your head spin and like any other commodity (that, ultimately is what the Jordans are) there's a lot of inside knowledge and background any investor or collector needs to know in order to get good value and upside asset potential.

Like the Air Jordan XIII's, for example, which . . .

. . . were released in 1997. This model was known for its cushioning along the feet, designed by Hatfield. The black panther was the inspiration for the Air Jordan XIII, the sole resembles the pads on a panther's paw. But also the panther is the hologram on the back of the shoe which imitates a panther's eyes in the dark when light is shined on them. They were rereleased in 2005, which coincided with the release of the Air Jordan 8s shoe. 

In the movie He Got Game, the Air Jordan XIII was worn by Jake Shuttlesworth (Denzel Washington). Ray Allen, who played Jake's son Jesus in the film, wore them when he broke Reggie Millers's all-time record for made three-point shots during a game against the Lakers in Boston during the 2011 season. The Jordan brand re-released the Air Jordan XIII at the end of 2010, which included the French Blue/Flint Grey, White/Red-Black, 'Playoff' color way and the Black/Altitude Green color way. 

The Air Jordan XIII was originally released from 1997 to 1998. It was retroed in 2004, 2005, 2008, 2010, 2011, and 2013.

Got that? You better if you're even thinking about investing.

I was reminded about this glimpse of the underground economy by a story the other day in the Times about P.J. Tucker of the Phoenix Suns basketball team and his sneaker collection.

That's what they are--sneakers--not "athletic shoes." Athletic shoes are for over-weight, over-pampered kids from uptown prep schools.

Tucker has more than 2,000 pairs in his collection. 2000! Not all Jordans but a lot of those nonetheless.

And he's not alone. Many NBA and MLB stars not only cash in through sneaker endorsements but have huge collections of their own.

Evan Tucker, the Philadelphia 76ers point guard also has at least 2,000 in his. He confesses that he gorged on 57 pairs recently in a single afternoon of shopping at Sole Control. No sleeping on Lafayette for him.

He stashes them all over the place but mainly in four big closets in his basement, while waiting to figure out a permeant place to display them.

Learning that Jeremy Guthrie of the Kansas City Royals has a special vault for his kicks, Turner says, "I want to do something dope like that for mine."