December 24, 2019--Red-Nosed Rudolph

I couldn't carry a tune and so in 6th grade, when it was time for us to sing holiday songs, Mrs. Peterson told me just to move my lips, to lip-sync silently, so as not to throw any of my classmates off key.

And so I did. They would sing "Home For the Holidays," and I would pretend to be a part of things in my silent way.

The Christmas season was the worst. "Silent Night" was way beyond my musical capacities and I felt isolated and frustrated while the other kids negotiated the song's subtleties. And making matters worse, as a Jewish kid I wasn't up to speed about the "Virgin Mother" and child.

But then that 6th grade year a new Christmas song became widely popular--"Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer"--and Mrs. Peterson promptly put it on her class's playlist. She even suggested to me that I might be able to sing it without disrupting the others.

I quickly memorized the lyrics and from her nods and smiles knew when singing along I was doing at least acceptably.

This was more than 70 years ago and still, when the holiday season approaches the one song that runs in a loop in my consciousness is "Rudolph." One doesn't overcome childhood trauma all that easily. Or at all--

Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer
Had a very shiny nose
And if you ever saw it,
You would even say it glowed . . .

And yet, though I am analytically-minded, it wasn't until just last week that I paid attention to the inner meaning of the lyrics.

For example--

All of the other reindeer
Used to laugh and call him names
They never let poor Rudolph
Join in any reindeer games . . .

Perhaps it is because we are in the Age of Trump where bullying is an acceptable, even preferred way to behave, I hadn't noticed that bullying is one of the important themes of "Rudolph."

Nor had I fully noticed that ultimately the song is about inclusiveness, including of those with special needs (like having a shiny nose!), and the positive power of diversity.

How one foggy Christmas eve, Santa turned to the stigmatized Rudolph and asked him, with his bright nose to guide his sleigh.

We know how it ends--

Then how the reindeer loved him
As they shouted out with glee
"Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer
You'll go down in history"

I wonder what 6th graders are singing these days. I am sure some Hanukah songs and a few Kwanza songs. Hopefully, also "Rudolph." The message endures. 

December 11, 2018--Baby, It's Still Cold Outside

After my posting about the attack on the holiday song, "Baby It's Cold Outside," I've been hearing from friends who feel my "defense" of it is regressive and insensitive. It should be removed from the cannon of Christmas songs, they have been saying, because it is about date rape and has no place on the radio.

One friend managed to write something, yes, amusing about this fraught subject that I pass along to you without comment--

Since WDOK in Ohio decided to pull “Baby It’s Cold Outside” from its playlist because some were offended, I feel that these other holiday songs must also be removed since in various ways they are offensive as well. 

1. "I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus": Subjecting minors to softcore porn
2. The "Christmas Song": Open fire? Pollution? Folks dressed up like Eskimos? Cultural appropriation
3. "Holly Jolly Christmas": Kiss her once for me? Unwanted advances
4. "White Christmas?" Racist
5. "Santa Claus is Coming to Town": Sees you when you’re sleeping? Knows when you’re awake? Peeping Tom stalker
6. "Most Wonderful Time of the Year": Everyone telling you be of good cheer? Forced to hide depression
7. "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer": Bullying
8. "It’s Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas": Forced gender-specific gifts: dolls for Janice and Jen and boots and pistols (GUNS?) for Barney and Ben
9. "Santa Baby": Gold digger, blackmail
10. "Frosty the Snowman": Adult snowman pursuing inappropriate relationships with children
11. "Do You Hear What I Hear?": Blatant disregard for the hearing impaired
12. "Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas": Make the yuletide GAY? Wow, just wow
13. "Jingle Bell Rock": Giddy up jingle horse, pick up your feet: animal abuse
14. "Mistletoe and Holly": Overeating, folks stealing a kiss or two? 
15. "Winter Wonderland": Parson Brown demanding they get married…forced partnership
16. "Silver Bells": Cruelly mocks tinnitus sufferers

Celebrate your holiday of choice responsibly.

I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus.

December 26, 2017--Merry Jack

"At the risk of spoiling your holiday, I thought to give you a call to wish you a merry whatever."

"To you as well," I said to Jack, "In fact I was thinking about you last week as your president and a very wimped-out Republican Congress passed that so-called tax reform bill."

I heard Jack trying to suppress a laugh. "'So called?' There are all sorts of reforms in it but not ones you like, so instead of acknowledging that you make fun of it. You don't consider the cut in corporate taxes to be a reform? If not, I don't see what you would you would see as a reform."

"Genuine and permanent cuts in taxes for the middle class, for example. This version is tipped way to the benefit of wealthy people like Trump himself who have large real estate assets and tens and hundreds of millions to pass along to their children when they die."

"I read what you wrote last week about the doubling of the standard deduction and raising the child tax credit," Jack said, "Even you agreed that it could so help lower-income people that it could turn out to be a political benefit to Republicans come the midterm elections next year. And of course 2020."

"It's true that I did speculate about that, but all the independent analyses of the bloated, nearly 1,000-page bill is that it's not only full of loopholes and carve-outs for special interests but whatever cuts middle income people will see, after a few years, will be ratcheted back and they will have to deal with tax increases."

"What did you call this? 'Speculation.' What's that worth? Speculation is another way of referring to your opinion. You love lecturing people about that. You're the one who rails about confusing facts with opinions. But now you don't have facts to back up your case but just opinions. One thing though I'll grant you is that no one knows for sure the full effect of something this huge. Especially what you and your friends mockingly say about the consequences of trickle-down. You know your history--the Reagan tax cuts rescued a very weak economy that he inherited from Jimmy Carter. There was a spurt of growth and a dramatic reduction in inflation."

"And, pay attention to this, a tripling of the national debt. Like the current bill, it wasn't paid for. The Trump tax bill will add up to $2.0 trillion to the debt. Ditto for George W. Bush's tax cut. It led to the Great Recession and a doubling of the debt. You guys call us tax-and-spend liberals. I call you tax-cut and spend conservatives. At least with someone like Bill Clinton and, for that matter, your pariah, Barack Obama--both Democrats by the way--there was growth and in both their cases a lowering of the deficit and debt."

"You call Obama's two percent of annual growth to be a healthy economy? It was during his time that the middle class got creamed. Especially men."

"You're ignoring what he inherited from Bush. The world's economy was about to go over the cliff. You guys are good at glomming over unpleasant facts."

"And you're not? How about the facts of economic growth over the past year? Trump's first year. How come you never want to talk about that? Look at the stock market and employment numbers. You and your friends say it's the result of momentum from Obama policies. That Trump had nothing to do with it. Fess up--if the economy had crashed this past year wouldn't you be blaming Trump? One thing you specialize in is talking out of both sides of your mouth."

"That's the way politics works. We're all guilty of engaging in spinning." That much I granted to Jack.

"And haven't you been a huge beneficiary of the run up in the value of stocks? How's your 401(k) looking these days? I assume pretty good. I don't hear any complaints about that."

I chose not to baited into talking about that with Jack but instead said, "Another thing you're conveniently ignoring is that tax legislation doesn't exist in a vacuum. By severely restricting deductions for state and local taxes and capping how much mortgage interest people can deduct millions of middle class people will not be happy with what they see about the value of their own assets. The value of homes, the major asset of most people, is expected to decline by as much as ten percent. And this will not just be in blue states as Republicans love to chuckle about. Millions in Texas and Florida and Arizona, to mention a few red states, will also see big declines in the value of their homes. I admit that the major hits will be in Democratic states like New Jersey and California and suburban parts of New York. High tax, high inflation states. But Republican home owners in those states will also be hurt."

"And here I thought I was just calling to wish you a merry Christmas and poke you about all the people on TV ads thanking Trump for allowing them to celebrate Christmas. About that you and I are of the same opinion. This is just ridiculousness."