December 4, 2018--Baby It's Cold Outside

Initially I didn't get it. 

The Huff Post among others reported that a Cleveland radio station has taken "Baby It's Cold Outside" off its playlist, saying that in the #MeToo era its lyrics represent a case of sexual harassment and coercion.

"Now I think we're going too far," I said to Rona, "I'm all for exposing and even putting Bill Cosby and Harvey Weinstein in jail--what they did was disgusting and are felonies--but are we now going to scrutinize lyrics of songs from the 1940s to see if they're offensive? The next thing we'll be doing is return to banning movies and books."

"I always thought," Rona said, "there's something creepy about that song."

"And I always thought of it as charming. I looked it up on Wiki and it's usually performed as a duet, as a form of racy dialogue between a man and a women. For example Garth Brooks and Trisha Yearwood and Willie Nelson and Nora Jones covered it. It's cold out and the man tries to get the woman to stay with him by the fire."

"Yeah, and have another drink and presumably go to bed with him."

"The drink part I don't remember but I agree that there's the implication that they might go to bed together."

"Implication? That's the whole point of the song. Let's read the lyrics and see what people are finding to be offensive.

I really can't stay - but baby it's cold outside I've got to go away - but baby it's cold outside This evening has been - Been hoping that you'd drop in So very nice - I'll hold your hands, they're just like ice My mother will start to worry And father will be pacing the floor - Listen to the fireplace roar So really I'd better scurry - Beautiful, please don't hurry Well, maybe just a half a drink more - Put some records on while I pour The neighbours might think - But baby it's bad out there Say, what's in this drink? - No cabs to be had out there I wish I knew how - Your eyes are like starlight now To break the spell - I'll take your hat, your hairs looks swell I ought to say no, no, no sir - Mind if I move in closer? At least I'm gonna say that I tried - What's the sense of hurting my pride? I really can't stay - Oh baby don't hold out Ah but it's cold outside - Baby it's cold outside I simply must go - But baby it's cold outside The answer is no -But baby it's cold outside The welcome has been - How lucky that you dropped in So nice and warm - Look out that window at that storm My sister will be suspicious - God your lips look delicious My brother will be there at the door - Waves upon a tropical shore My maiden aunt's mind is vicious - Gosh your lips are delicious Well, maybe just a cigarette more -Never such a blizzard before I got to get home - But baby you'd freeze out there Say, lend me a comb - It's up to your knees out there You've really been grand - I'm thrilled when you touch my hand Why don't you see - How can you do this thing to me? There's bound to be talk tomorrow - Think of my lifelong sorrow At least there will be plenty implied - If you caught pneumonia and died I really can't stay - Get over that hold-out Ah but it's cold outside - Ah but it's cold outside (Only the man:) Where could you be going When the wind is blowing And it's cold outside? (Both:) Baby it's cold, cold outside


I said, "It does feel a little slimy. It's almost a chronicle of date-rape."

"What's also at issue," Rona said, "is what the lyrics say about the sexual mores of that era. How a woman had to hide her sexuality. If she wanted sex she had to sneak around so as not to sully her reputation. The men, on the other hand, could boast about their conquests."

"But even if I agree with you isn't it tame by comparison to most of the rap songs out there which are often totally explicit? Are we going to start banishing them too?"

"That's a fair question. A lot of them are out-of-the-closet misogynist." Rona shrugged and said, "It's true that many are beyond offensive. But if I'm honest I don't know how to think about the bigger picture when it comes to popular music or, for that matter, literature and movies."

"Yet another thing that's more complicated that it at first seems.

October 4, 2018--A Subdued Trump

Until a day or two ago Trump had been on a roll and, incredibly, at times almost sounded like a normal person.

He spoke moderately about deputy attorney general Rod Rosenstein. After the ("failing") New York Times wrote about how Rosenstein contemplated wearing a wire to record Trump's irrational behavior, when all were expecting him to fire Rosenstein and perhaps even Robert Mueller, Trump said he really wants to "keep" Rosenstein, that he'll meet with him in a week or so, and "we'll see what happens." As if Trump had nothing to do with the what happens.

When Senator Jeff Flake got the Senate judiciary committee to delay a week before voting on Brett Kavanaugh's appointment to the Supreme Court, to allow the FBI time to reopen its background check, rather than returning to ranting about and mocking the Arizona senator ("Jeff Flakey"), he offered temperate comments about this being a good idea. "No rush," he again said, "We'll see what happens." He even offered to withdraw Kavanaugh from consideration if he is found to have lied during his testimony before the committee.

Then he bullied Mexico and Canada to agree to significant changes in NAFTA. Changes even Democrats such as Chuck Schumer praised. A new-seeming Trump barely took a victory lap.

I thought someone in the White House must have slipped some Thorazine into his Big Macs.

Most amazing, after Dr. Christine Blasey Ford's wrenching statement to the judiciary committee, rather than attacking her credibility, Trump spoke softly about how it is important to listen to what she has to say and, again, if it proved to be true, he indicated he would withdraw Kavanaugh's nomination. 

But then, on Tuesday, unable to contain himself, Trump lashed out, mocking Dr. Ford.

At a rally in Southaven, Mississippi, imitating her voice, he spun out this viscous two-character Q&A--

"How did you get home? 'I don't remember.' How did you get there? 'I don't remember.' Where is the place? 'I don't remember.' How many years ago was it? 'I don't know. I don't know. I don't know.'"

That, I thought, is the Trump I know. Playing to his misogynist base.

Where had he been? What had he been up to?

I suspect, probing to find his best political way to respond to all the battering before launching new lines of attack.

And then he found his strategy--

He set his nasty little dialogue in a new context.

At the Mississippi rally he told parents in the audience, in the era of #MeToo, boys are in more danger than girls. Daughters might be threatened by sexually assault but their sons might find themselves falsely accused of committing sexual abuse and thus have their lives ruined. 

He said, "It's a very scary time for young men in America when you can be guilty of something you may not be guilty of. This is a very difficult time."

This is red meat for his base. Especially for middle-age white men who have felt their prerogatives, their privileges threatened, initially by how they experienced the women's movement which, among other things, called for equal pay, sexual parity, control of their bodies, political and executive equivalence, and now by the MeToo movement.

Women with access to a microphone or blog or a corporate human resources office have the power, these disaffiliated men feel, not only to boss them around, but with a simple accusation potentially ruin their lives.

It doesn't help the progressive cause when cable news outlets such as CNN have guests drawing comparisons between Bill Cosby (a convicted sexual predator) and Brett Kavanaugh. No matter how despicable and slimy he feels, Kavanaugh has not been convicted of anything, much less being, like Cosby, a "serial rapist."

We may already be seeing the beginnings of the political consequences from the new Trump campaign to play on this anger, these fears. 

In a number of key Senate battleground red states where Democrats are seeking to retain seats, poll numbers are beginning to swing in their opponents' direction. In North Dakota, for example, Senator Heidi Heitkamp who was running neck-and-neck with Kevin Cramer is now trailing by about 10 points.

We need to get to work. There are just four weeks until Election Day. We know Trump will be campaigning full time. Assuming he doesn't get any more love letters from Kim Jong-un.

November 15, 2017--Punishing Sexual Assault

Some of the most distressing news of recent times has been the wave of outings of men with power using it to sexually assault usually younger women over whom they have authority.

But some of the best news of recent times is about the courage these women are showing as they confront their accusers and risk stigmatization and the resurrection of the emotional nightmares they experienced in some case decades ago.

From movie producer Harvey Weinstein to comedian Louis C.K. to senatorial candidate Roy Moore, and lest we forget, Bill Crosby, the stories are horrifying, yet familiar.

And, yes, there is Fox News, which makes the predatory sexual climate of Mad Men seem like an innocent tea party.  

In my case, I know one of the accused, Leon Wieseltier, the former literary editor of the New Republic. This for me brings it close to home. 

The details of Leon's behavior are sadly typical--

Several women said they were humiliated when he kissed them on the mouth in front of other staff members. Others said he discussed his sex life, including describing in detail the breasts of a former girlfriend. He made passes at female colleagues and pressed them to describe their sex lives. 

Daily, we are hearing stories like this and worse.

But things get more complicated when thinking about appropriate punishment.

With the exception of Crosby and perhaps Weinstein, it is unlikely than any of these men will be criminally prosecuted. Some are and will be sued in civil court and hopefully, if guilty, will need to pay for emotional damages that they caused.

And then there are the private settlements that have occurred. Most dramatically, Bill O'Reilly paying one of the women he abused an astonishing $32 million.

In other instances, especially when the accused are well known or famous, they will suffer public disgrace and likely lose any possibility of resuming their careers. Weinstein will never again produce a feature film, Bill O'Reilly will never return to TV, Leon Wieseltier will never write and publish another literary critique.

Some will enter sex-addiction treatment programs (or pretend to), stay out of public view for a year or so, and then attempt to crawl back to their previous occupations. Weinstein is allegedly in such a program. 

In these instances the punishment is informal--employers will not take the risk to bring them back. In the case of the news or entertainment businesses, executives will not take the chance of being picketed or that sponsors will abandon them. Sponsor abandonment and boycotting are what ultimately brought O'Reilly down.

In the case of Roy Moore, perhaps, perhaps the voters of Alabama will keep him out of the Senate and the public eye. That would serve as a version of punishment.

Coauthor of Game Change, Mark Halpern, did numerous slimy things a number of years ago (and, who knows, perhaps more recently). After being exposed recently he lost his multi-million dollar book deal with Penguin Press and was fired by MSNBC and Bloomberg News. Will any publisher or TV network ever take another chance with him? Will they trust that he will be able to control himself, or more significant to a network, that he will be able to attract viewers and thus sponsors or readers. In other words, build viewership, sell books, and make money?

While we are furious about what is daily being revealed, it is understandable that we might feel there is justice seeing these careers ruined. The perpetrators brought this on themselves and deserve all the punishment they are receiving. It seems appropriate. 

But in some instances is it possible that the consequences are beyond fairness? How do we even think about fairness in circumstances when much of the punishment occurs in extralegal ways?

I am not sufficiently without flaws to make these judgements. Difficult as it is with emotions so raw, thinking about this still seems worthwhile.

Thoughts are welcome.

Leon Wieseltier